Singles, singles and more Muslim singles... There are several them, in all shapes, dimensions, races and with various qualifications. Yet, there doesn't appear to be one singleton sparking enough interest to say 'let's take this further and go for a coffee? ' Thus what's going wrong at these marriage events? Just how do single Muslims get married these days?
The particular hush voices and the deafening awkwardness is inevitable as the singles wait around for the event to start. Muslim marriage events
I watch them tiresomely introduce themselves again and again. I see some public losing interest, playing on their phone or leaping onto their social media lives. I even experience many bromances and womances blossoming before my eyes... huh?
Eventually when the intros are over, relief... Phew! Then the dissatisfaction hits. Why? Because will be certainly no person you want approach! You scroll down the set of names and still nobody interests you or is remotely like the person you want to marry! You get to the end of the list and start again hoping you overlooked someone, you understand you haven't and the stifled despair is clear to see... argh!
Half the folks you've met you don't even remember, many people turned up late and missed the intros altogether! Clearly creating a good first impression isn't important when you're trying to meet your true love!
After much consideration and deliberation the singles send some asks for or accept 'requests to meet' for a one-to-one conversation.
These one-to-one discussions can leave you speechless at the lack of 'conversation'! At the other end of the spectrum, amazingly some singles are ready to drop their lives, marry and move in with you tomorrow! It makes you wonder, what on earth just happened?!
Lonely hearts walk away from these one-to-ones feeling completely underwhelmed. The brothers talk at the sisters, hoping something they said would hook up with them. While the sisters' preferred approach is a inhospitable and uncensored interrogation of the brothers' past relationships and haraam (prohibited) activities... Awkward much!
Despite placing yourself through all of that and with little luck in meeting someone suitable, how do singles get married nowadays... or is it that they just don't?!
Some have been trying to get married for a long time. They attend marriage events and use online marriage websites yet they're still struggling to find 'the one'. They say they're okay with it however feeling of defeat is palpable.
The brothers either don't know very well what they want or they think the sisters are too picky. Whereas the sisters think the brothers are premature, untrustworthy and irresponsible... ouch!
Singles with no 'requests to meet' make a quick exit hoping no person notices. While others cling on to hope that someone will speak to them at some point.
We watch the big event organisers keen to see the public find marriage, seek away singles and personally set up a 'request to meet' with other singles. On the other hand it takes some coaxing, cajoling and a huge dollop of luck to do this.
Sadly sometimes there are also after-effects of these events... There are some brothers who can't take no for an answer and think following a solitary Muslimah (Muslim woman) to the bus stop or tracking her down on social media is a great move... Stalker much!!
It leaves me with the question: how many brothers and sisters exchange numbers (not including bromances or womances) and actually take the next step to meet again?
So how does it leave these singles... Do Muslim public know how to 'date' halal? Usually are they at these activities because they want to be there? Or is it because their siblings, friends and cousins are getting married and they feel left right behind!
These marriage events are a great source of conference other singles. They've successfully paired thousands of married people. But are singles taking full good thing about them?
Are the singles searching for a spark or even an inkling of one? Is that requesting for too much as a first meeting? Thus does that then imply love at first sight is out of the question?